Dating takes resilience. And the more opportunities you give yourself, the better the chances you’ll find that person. So maybe its not so surprising and even more encouraging that 90% of the singles I speak to who believe in true love say they know this because they have experienced it. It’s the strongest emotion we’ll ever feel. So, I set off and researched what professors are saying. So here you go;
Scientists say that there are three stages of love- lust, romantic obsession, and long-term attachment.
Stage 1; Let’s start with LUST (who wouldn’t) and that took me to the beach at spring break in Fort Lauderdale….can you relate?
Stage 2; Romantic obsession, or attraction. You’re obsessed, it takes over your whole life, like a state of need, you can’t eat, sleep, or think straight. Sounds like a scene from a movie. Can’t imagine a world with everyone in that state of romantic obsession. We’d all be nuts.
Stage 3; Which is why, with any luck, romantic obsession becomes Attachment. So, I reconnected with a couple I matched 20 years ago, that was certainly still attached with a combined 4 children, 15 grandchildren, and a couple of great grandchildren.
I came away from this with a renewed sense that true love does really exist. Part of being a matchmaker is, you know, trying to solve the unsolvable. What brings two singles together? What makes people stay together? I guess there are no real-life answers as there is there is no research on the work that it takes to sustain it over a long period of time. I’m not sure why, maybe because it boring!!!!….like the day in and day out of who’s getting the toilet paper.
Your comments?
contact [email protected]
Not Interested? Just Say So.
Most singles often don’t know how to express what’s going on for them when dating is not working. It might be they simply don’t understand why its not working or know how to explain it. Its like you could literally run a mile away from it, and its making single people not want to go on ANY dates.
The dating scene has completely evolved over the last decade where I have played cupid. One factor that makes dating harder is finding someone looking for the same type of relationship. Over 50% of the singles I speak to lately, indicate that this factor is a problem. People define relationships differently, and they have different approaches to beginning one. Trying to date someone who does not indicate wanting to take the relationship the next level can be frustrating. That is why it’s important to simply ask where someone is at and be honest with your hopes.
What if one could simply and politely say: “Hey I enjoyed spending time with you and would like to keep getting to know you” and give them an out if they’re not feeling the same way (e.g. “and yet, if you’re not interested, zero hard feelings. I’d just like to know where you’re at”)
Who here agrees? Thoughts…
Everyone Agrees: Christmas is about Love.
It’s almost Christmas time again and, to borrow the words of a famous disco hit in the 70’s “Love is in the air”. And its a well-known fact that love is “in the air” every Christmas. It features in songs we hear as we shop, commercials we see, and present in the cards we send and the words we write on the tags we attach to the presents we give. With Love From……
But when you read them phrase by phrase, and apply them to yourself, if you are single, they can transpose into a different key altogether. It can cease to be rhetorically pleasing and emotionally soothing; instead, they become a deeply challenging analysis of your single life.
Perhaps that’s not what we expected this Christmas time….but when romantic love visits you again, I pray it stays till next Christmas.
Victoria’s own Golden Bachelorette
Before retiring, she has had a long-standing career in education in Victoria and is most proud of her work volunteering. This bachelorette is spending her “go-go years” planning group hikes, listening to a all kinds of music and fun golf. After traveling to over 20 countries, and a few road trips, it’s safe to say she is looking for a travel buddy to accompany her on her travels who is kind, smart, funny, and confident.
Fun Fact; She declared her love for the Beatles from a young age. One of her highlights was seeing Paul McCartney live in Guadalajara, Mexico where he performed nonstop for 3 hours.
She is genuinely searching for a late-in-life partner, 65+, who is getting the most out of their physical attributes, pushing themselves, and looking to have fun.
Interested ? For more information please DM or email [email protected]
One word: LOVE
One word: LOVE — It’s ingrained in my mind and heart and guides my thinking, everyday.
But for some singles, it can feel like a hard word. Which can actually be good for you, as it can give cause to stop, pause and think, “Love”. Even when it’s hard and feels almost unattainable like a pie-in-the-sky kind of emotional crutch, in your world.
Which is why I’m thankful in knowing in no uncertain terms what love looks like.
Here’s what I have learned;
And yet LOVE continues toward the purpose it was given.
Can you explain LOVE in one sentence ?
We are on the search for a Vancouver Bachelor for our Vancouver Bachelorette.
We are on the search for a Vancouver Bachelor for our Vancouver Bachelorette.
Meet Bachelorette B, a fun loving, smart educational professional in her 30’s. Brimming with positive energy and intellectual curiosity, she enjoys reading, drinking coffee and is active in sailing, cycling, and running on the seawall with her dog. Bachelorette B is a nurturing woman who loves cooking for her friends. She is funny , kind, adventurous and is a real gem!
Her ideal matches are guys 35-45, who are smart, genuinely kind, funny, quirky guys. She’s very open and wants to fall in love with his brain and would like to have a family. Prefer Vancouver area (but lower mainland ok too).
Interested ? For more information please DM or email [email protected]
Do you Skip the Small Talk ?
If you are turned on by intelligence, you’re a sapiosexual. If this describes you, and you are looking for a partner, here is a few tips that are essential.
Of course, you still will have to go on a few dates to find someone you’re attracted to, but once you do, you might find you have those core values in line with the other person.
Never apologize for what you are attracted to—–we like what we like!
The GOLDEN BACHELOR
Dating at any age is awkward, scary and often a pain. True, being in the over-60 group may mean that more people your age are already off the market, however after 20 years as a matchmaker and myself in my mid- 60’s, the mature dating pool isn’t dismal, even if all the apps seem like they are.
Meet Jerry Turner. This Golden Bachelor who is a father of two and grandfather of two, is a “hopeless romantic”. He’s looking for someone to “share the sunset years of life” and has realized that life is just too short to play games and he realizes dating is different than it was 50 years ago. While there is no real matchmaking algorithm with the niche Bachelor spin-off show, he remains positive about his prospects, saying he “has nothing to lose”. Whether he would get married again, he shared “I wouldn’t discount it!”
In reality people over 60 are finding love everyday.
Believe in True Love? I hope you do!
Dating takes resilience. And the more opportunities you give yourself, the better the chances you’ll find that person. So maybe its not so surprising and even more encouraging that 90% of the singles I speak to who believe in true love say they know this because they have experienced it. It’s the strongest emotion we’ll ever feel. So, I set off and researched what professors are saying. So here you go;
Scientists say that there are three stages of love- lust, romantic obsession, and long-term attachment.
Stage 1; Let’s start with LUST (who wouldn’t) and that took me to the beach at spring break in Fort Lauderdale….can you relate?
Stage 2; Romantic obsession, or attraction. You’re obsessed, it takes over your whole life, like a state of need, you can’t eat, sleep, or think straight. Sounds like a scene from a movie. Can’t imagine a world with everyone in that state of romantic obsession. We’d all be nuts.
Stage 3; Which is why, with any luck, romantic obsession becomes Attachment. So, I reconnected with a couple I matched 20 years ago, that was certainly still attached with a combined 4 children, 15 grandchildren, and a couple of great grandchildren.
I came away from this with a renewed sense that true love does really exist. Part of being a matchmaker is, you know, trying to solve the unsolvable. What brings two singles together? What makes people stay together? I guess there are no real-life answers as there is there is no research on the work that it takes to sustain it over a long period of time. I’m not sure why, maybe because it boring!!!!….like the day in and day out of who’s getting the toilet paper.
Your comments?
contact [email protected]
Are you Interviewing or Dating?
Everyone who has used a dating app or website knows that you can get incredibly exhausted of scrolling through profiles and sending messages. And it takes even more time to investigate and VERIFY that someone isn’t exaggerating or just flat out lying.
If you are a discerning dater, why waste your time?
On the other hand, your matchmaker (a real person) will give you real, VERIFIED information after vetting each match for you. That helps eliminate blind spots about the person you are about to meet and no more getting involved in the verification process.
Message me if you are interested in joining our MATCHMAKER VERIFIED active database ?
Which BTW….costs nothing to join.
[email protected]
Aren’t you supposed to learn to like my Quirks?
Apparently not.
Most of the singles I meet have had their fair share of down-and-out dating moments. Dates that end with a follow up text detailing all of your first date faux pas, the list goes on (and on). So , I have a lot of empathy for all you dating warriors, who keep putting yourselves out there, trying to figure out what the other side wants, striving to be open to, and have enthusiasm for…… I don’t know, falling in LOVE.
All these things start to make me think that perhaps we’ve lost an important virtue on our way to finding a relationship; HUMILITY.
I’m not talking about letting every bad date be proof of what’s wrong with you or your expectations, but humility is acknowledging that maybe we could do a better job of not being so hung up on ourselves and our non negotiables, and that we can acknowledge these faults and start getting out of our own way on the path to finding a partner. Sure, we all deserve our own meet-cute, charming moments, that we can forget that we’re all flawed. That’s the part that makes up beautiful and interesting. And it’s also part of what makes us annoying.
Truth be known, once you take a moment to swallow your pride, you might find how you learn to reconsider your habits in dating—its empowering– and therapeutic in a world where so much nonsense dating behavior is out of your hands.